One of the things I’ve been working on in my life is to know what I want and to be more clear about asking for it. Being “nice” and enduring for the sake of harmony is not a virtue.
That’s sometimes hard for me to remember in my home culture and native language. Practicing such a lesson in a new culture and language is a whole new level of challenge.
So, a couple stories from this week.
Monday in choir rehearsal, the bass section leader was playing the bass line for us to learn new music. As he had done in the past, he was playing strange chords and mixing bass, baritone and tenor lines all together. I had asked him to play only the bass line, “por favor, toca solo la linea basso?” Only, he kept randomly throwing in notes above and below the bass line, making it impossible to follow. I looked around the room and everyone had a confused, blank look. But no one was saying anything. They just kept trying (unsuccessfully) to follow along.
So finally, I spoke up said, that’s not right, “Eso no es correcto.” The leader looked startled and did it again. To which I repeated, “Eso no es correcto.” At this point, others jumped in to show him what we needed. He explained he was giving us tenor and baritone notes “for reference.” But finally (at the end of the rehearsal) he played the line as written.
All week, I wondered if I was out of line. There was nothing I could point to. But I had the sense of, “How dare this foreigner correct things?”
On Thursday, when we broke into sectionals, the choir director came to lead the basses, instead of our usual leader. He quickly, and simply led us through the notes as written, without complicating things and we made huge progress in just thirty minutes. It was a remarkable difference.
I believe the administrative section leader said something to the choir director and so I later thanked him. He just smiled coyly.
In Spanish class, our new teacher is great at making complex topics more simple. But she talks fast and moves fast through those topics.
Often, I see that I’m not the only one struggling. I try to ask questions and to clarify, slowing things down and actually helping everyone.
On Friday, before the teacher arrived, I asked the class to help me and to ask more questions. They nodded agreeably.
We were learning about words and phrases that are related to romantic relationships, that aren’t literal translations, more idiomatic.
“Tontear,” literally means “to fool around.” But in a romantic relationship, that’s NOT what it means. That was clear. She kept explaining what it does mean. I kept asking for more clarification and repetition. Of course, all of the answers were in Spanish and for the life of me, it wasn’t clear.
I finally asked each member of the class, “do you understand?” And each one said they did! Ugh. How embarrassing!
After several more attempts, I think in this context, “tontear” is “to date someone at that stage of the relationship where you clearly like each other, but are not yet dating exclusively.” I think.
The language challenges and the lack of written communication also made this a difficult and crazy week for choir.
On Monday I learned we had a concert on Tuesday. That really bugged me. So when they asked if I was going, I simply said, “No, I have other plans.” (A bold faced lie.) I have repeatedly asked for information in writing, with enough advance notice to plan accordingly. Usually, they’re very helpful. But in this case, it wasn’t there and my brain was exhausted from trying to understand what was going on. So I just said, “no.”
I also learned that we had a concert on Saturday. And a rehearsal in another town on Friday night at 10:00 p.m. Fortunately, I didn’t have other plans and I wasn’t trying to be difficult. So I planned to be at both.
They provided a bus on Friday night. We met at 8:45, left at 9:00, and arrived in the quaint small town of Godelleta in time to rehearse with the orchestra in the town square at 10:00.

Opposite City Hall is a music organization that organized a benefit concert for Vincente Ferrar Foundation, to benefit a housing non profit in India. As they prepared for the rehearsal, they moved drums, an electric piano and other instruments from the second floor balcony.
As the choir continued to arrive, the orchestra practiced.
We sang three songs, each only once, then we walked back to the bus and drove back to Valencia. 😜
On Saturday, we performed at the Palau de la Musica, the benefit concert that included a number of famous Spanish musicians.
One of those is Francisco… one name, like Cher or Sting.
The concert concluded with us singing with Francisco, Himno de la Comunidad Valencia. As the song began, the audience rose to their feet, as if standing for the national anthem. You tend to hear this song played a lot during Falles. There’s a lot pride and connection to this piece with the people of Valencia.
Singing there was fun. But it also became quite stressful. Our choir director was not the conductor this time. So he sang with us. And he chose quite deliberately to stand next to me. I felt the whole time as if I was being judged. I may or may not have been. But I know I made more mistakes than I would have otherwise.
Was this because of my causing “trouble” on Monday? The things our brains tell us! It was probably coincidental. At least, that’s what I’m trying to tell myself.
To add to the confusion, on my other side was one of our best bass singers. This should have been easy for me. But I found them both singing distinctly different rhythms in places, with me trying to sing it as we learned it, more like my fellow bass singer. Talk about messing with my brain!
Other things from this week: On Tuesday evening, Rafa called and asked if I wanted to take a drive with him to Cullera to pick up something he needed. So we did.

Cullera is a lovely sea-side town about 30 minutes south of Valencia. I look forward to going back when I can spend more time there. Beautiful beaches, a castle/ fortress, restaurants and marinas. It looks like a great place for a weekend getaway.
Sunday, I had no plans and the weather was perfect. Sunny and upper 70’s. So, I packed my backpack, caught the #25 bus and went to the beach.

A great way to end the week.
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